It’s been an interesting week. Jessica and Matt got engaged at the Wizards game last week, but don’t plan on getting married anytime soon. That’s alright with me, because I don’t want her to push it just for me. I like Matt, but it’s a little early. I will say that they seem to get along well. Jessica is training him, just like her mother trained me. For example, Jessica was changing her goldfish’s water and the fish jumped in the sink and went down the drain. Matt rushed around and got a wrench and pulled apart the pipe in an ill-fated effort to save it. Needless to say, the fish survived the trauma for a while, but was floating the next morning. Matt stood up for himself however, flushing it down the toilet instead of burying it out back.

I’ve come down to Big Moses to meet up with a couple of the Michigan girls and meet our cousins from Ritchie County whom we have never met before. I’ve been visiting cousins I haven’t seen in a while, but it’s been a challenge to find them. The good old GPS system on my phone is very confident when it’s giving directions, but when it says “Your Destination is on the Right” and it’s an empty field it just sits there and plays dumb. After asking directions from a Human Being, I found the house a couple of miles further down the road. At least it was the same road. When I used it on the second destination, it would have taken me about 10 miles out of the way. Luckily, I had a good idea where their house was, and when I got there and saw the big WVU painted on his Pouting Shed, I knew I was in the right place. His Pouting Shed is where he stores his motorcycle, boat and other toys. It is known as a ManCave in some areas of the country. A Pouting Shed is where someone goes when the wife is pissed. For the record, his wife is a jewel, and I’m sure he doesn’t really call it that.

I was talking to our cousin Sadonna, who is a teacher here in the county. I mentioned that we had a relative that was the Principle of an Elementary school in Parkersburg, which is not too far away. They have known each other for a long time, and had no idea they were cousins.

I’ll be here until Wednesday and then heading back. I think Linda was worried about me staying here, she asked me twice IF I was coming back. I told her I wasn’t bringing Seabiscuit, so not to worry.

Everyone has a favorite restaurant. More than a few of my friends and family have shared a meal at the Forest Diner with me over the last few months. The food is pretty good, not overpriced, and you can get breakfast at any time. But the restaurant that I compare every other restaurant to, especially when it comes to Prime Rib, is the Sunset in Glen Burnie. Other than the Honey Bee Diner which is Burnie’s version of the Forest Diner, there isn’t a decent restaurant in northern Anne Arundel County. I’m sure there are decent restaurants, but since within this blog, mine is the only opinion that counts, the Sunset is it.

I had the opportunity to share this culinary experience with Louis and Mitzi. It was my payback for helping her find her new car. They were buying us dinner at a restaurant of my choice. First a little about Louis, who in my opinion is a world class cook. I apologize to all the ladies out there that turn a mean skittle, Grandma Spencer, and Aunt Peggy included (may they rest in peace), but Louis is the best.

Linda and I have been going to the Sunset Restaurant since our first anniversary and have never failed to have a great meal, whether it’s Surf and Turf, Prime Rib, Cream of Crab, or the Strawberry Shortcake Dessert. We haven’t been back as often since we moved up here, but have been back at every opportunity.

The Prime Rib, especially the Thick Cut, hangs over the big metal plate that they always warn you about not burning yourself. You can almost cut it with a fork. Every time I’ve ordered it, it comes out the same.

Except last Saturday night. Maybe it was the fact that they were slammed, but I saw it as soon as it hit the table. It didn’t look quite the same. The plate was hot, but that’s the only thing that resembled my dream Prime Rib. It was tough, filled with gristle, and if it wasn’t for dipping it in the au jus, would have been close to tasteless. Louis of course ordered the same based on my recommendation. So I’m sitting there with Louis Mitzi and Linda, feeling more crushed with every bite. At least Linda and Mitzi ordered something different. But my food guru Louis, being polite as always, commented on the size of the piece of meat, comparing it with a small animal. I’m sure he was thinking it tasted about the same, too.

After a few bites, in good conscience, I was forced to apologize to Louis for the meat. I considered sending it back, but as busy as the restaurant was, I figured it would be Sunday morning before we got to eat, so i soldiered on. Linda and Mitzi both exclaimed that their food was outstanding, but I’m not sure that wasn’t just trying to reduce my misery. I can only hope that Louis’ puppies will enjoy the large piece of meat that they will be sharing. I guess if they growl at me the next time I go over, I’ll know they didn’t like it either.

I just realized that I may never get invited to dinner at Louis again! He may not want to waste a great meal on a guy with such lousy taste in food. If I’d only known.

So the next time, reader, should the opportunity to share a meal with me ever comes, you get to choose the restaurant.

Yesterday was a tough day. I had some issues going in, and the IV contrast from the CT scan aggravated it. I got a taste for some Popeye’s chicken and some red beans and rice and had that for lunch. I’m sure that had nothing to do with the situation. Anyway, the rest of the day, and deep into the night, I was either sleeping or trotting, if you know what I mean.

I woke up this morning with plans to go for the results alone as I my normal driver was tied up at his real job, but Linda and Jessica would have none of it. Jessica called her boyfriend Matt and he was going to drive me, when Mitsi responded to Linda’s call and dropped what she was doing and drove me up. If you ever have to go to a meeting like this, go with Mitsi, she knows what questions to ask, and knows if the answers are the right ones. And besides, who would you guys choose, Matt or Mitsi? Sorry Matt.

I’ve been working on my Genealogy project, but the findings are getting hard to come by. I was able to find a grave site of a Great Aunt at the request of her Granddaughter. I found out what city she was living in, and looking on a Grave Site website, found a picture of her headstone. It’s a good feeling to get them “back together”.

I also got a real nice email from my cousin Etta. She’s one of our relatives that I was able to locate after about 30 years of no contact. She’s been reading this blog and told me it was “Good Reading”, which is about as good a compliment as I could hope for.

Linda and I are going to be traveling this summer, first to Florida to visit Dennis, then Tucson to visit Aunt Monna and a bunch of family members out there, and to Michigan for their family reunion in August. I’ll be coming down to Big Moses and riding around to meet some of our other relatives in the spring. Ocean City is also a “Destination Point” this summer.

I’m adding these things to my “Bucket List” as we go along. We’ve accomplished a lot in the first 6 months of this little exercise. I’ve got a new family, my “old” family has increased in size and I’ve come to realize what true friends we have ( Mitsi today). My daughter has graduated and has her first teaching position. My son is now a married man. Wow.

The girls jumped into the wine right away, and the Corona’s that were sitting outside since Jess’s party were ice cold. The girls took over the living room and were making so much noise I expected the cops to show up. We were having a great time as well telling jokes and lies to each other. The last guest left at 2 am.

When I got up the next day, there was enough empty Corona’s and wine bottles to fill up the Recycling Bin all by themselves!

I loved it, even though I wasn’t over it until Wednesday.

The rest of the week was nice and quiet as everyone went back to work so I finally had some nice relaxing days at home by myself.

Linda and I visited some friends today that are having some health issues. Since we are experts on this subject, we felt that maybe we could give them a little boost. We had a nice time, good conversation and I think it was appreciated. Pay it forward is easy, sometimes it’s just lending an ear.

I’ve been on a quest recently to help a friend find a car. I’m not going to mention any names, but this person is a tough cookie when it comes to opening her checkbook on frivolous things like a car. Anyway, I found a car that would fit her parameters and we went to check it out this afternoon. We got there about 30 minutes before closing, and after test driving, began to “work the deal”. I’ve been in this situation just about every Saturday night for the last 30 years, except on the other side of the desk. We went through the normal negotiating process and were still apart, so I walked into the Manager’s office and after some discussion, bumped the Used Car Manager $500 on the trade to get the deal MD wanted. The salesman just sat there with his jaw on the floor. When we walked out of the office, he shook my hand and thanked me for closing the deal. It felt good getting back into action, even though it was from the other side of the table. So MD is happy, the salesman is happy, LD will be happy when he figures out that if you let them get what they want, you will not be liable if something goes wrong with it. I’m happy because I can already taste that Prime Rib at the Sunset Restaurant.

They were searching, but didn’t really know for what, nor maybe even how to look for it. A long time friend invited them to his church. It was a very small church, not a “super synagogue”, but a simple little church that was small in size but very large in the warmth of its members. A young pastor, but with an old heart, greeted them along all the congregation. They returned, and returned again, and soon were enveloped in the doings of the church.

The parents were somewhat skeptical about their son and his girlfriend’s sudden transition from where they were before to what they had become. To be sure, it was a positive change, but was it just a fad or in fact a life change?

When the son invited his father to attend the church, his father attended because he promised he would, and also to “check out” this group of people that had become so important to his son and his girl. He found a little congregation that had a very big heart indeed. They had taken his son and girl in with open arms and had made them part of their family. The young pastor was a passionate and very caring minister that could lay a sermon out with so much intensity that you felt the wooden pews themselves wanted to come up and kneel down at the altar.

The other family members soon attended and became aware that this was a very good thing for the son and his girl.

When the son came to the parents with their announcement that they had decided to get married, the parents were worried if they were ready and if they knew what a wedding and everything around it entailed. They also knew that it was something to support with their hearts, and so they did.

The church gathered around the them, the parents, too, and the “Little Wedding that Could” had a set date. Everything was done by volunteers, gifts, and prayers. The kids worked hard without wavering to bring this in on time and on a very small budget.

There were a lot of roadblocks set up, not only the normal things, but as this was a test, two major storms that brought the area to a standstill. Every time something reared up it’s head to stop this “Little Wedding that Could” someone would jump in and help keep it on the track. When his vehicle broke, probably due to his volunteering at the hospital during the worst of both storms to shuttle nurses and other essential people to and from, someone else jumped in and miraculously got his Jeep on the road in hours, not days.

The roof of the church’s Sunday School, where the Rehearsal dinner was scheduled to be held, was leaking and threatening to collapse. Someone else jumped in and found a new place for the dinner.

Saturday came, and everyone came to that little church. Long distant friends and family braved the worst winter in 100 years to share the joy with them. The church was filled almost to the rafters with the relatives and friends, and the church family as well. The son and his girl were glowing. The young pastor guided the service with such grace and heartfelt passion that I have seen no equal. I hope that he maintains that same passion on his 10,000th wedding as he did with this one. I have a feeling that he will.

The reception was also a great success. The food, provided by some Church members and family friends, was good food indeed. There was no booze or band, but it was the best wedding reception that I had been to. I admit to some prejudice. Everyone had a great time sharing this with the newlyweds and each other. They all went home happy.

So the “Little Wedding that Could” sent off the newlyweds with memories for everyone that will last a lifetime. It showed once again that there are different kinds wealth. I have documented my feelings about my being a very rich man. In watching this “Little Wedding that Could” plow through all the obstacles that were through against it, I realize that our son and his bride share that wealth as well.

There were too many people to count that kept this “Little Wedding that Could” on track. I hope this story is some compensation for their generosity.

First things first. I went on Wednesday for my monthly checkup. Everything went well with my visit with Nurse Monica and the doctor. They were pleased with the way it was going. Of course, a couple of hours after I got home Nurse Monica called to tell me the urine sample showed high levels of creatinine and I should stop taking the medicine until we could redo the test. If the drug was hurting my one remaining kidney, I would have to stop it. I then spent the next 12 hours or so figuring out Plan B. I went back the next day and gave the sample after a couple of “failure to perform” attempts and about a gallon of water. The results came back in the normal range and I’m back on the drug. Plan B can wait.

On Thursday, after months and years of trying to find our Ritchie County relatives so they can sign off on a new oil lease so we can drill for gas again and start getting Royalties, I finally found them. We’ve tried everything short of hiring a Private Eye. I found a website that gave me phone numbers for free and got the numbers for all the Spencer’s in Auburn and Harrisville, WV. Auburn is where their farm was located and Harrisville is were Norval Dale Spencer had died in 1984. There were a total of 12. 6 were disconnected, 5 weren’t the right Spencer’s. The last one called back and told me he was the Grandson of the Norval Spencer I was looking for. I spoke with 3 of the 5 heirs and told them about the opportunity we have.
It wasn’t till the next day that I realized that they knew nothing about it, and if they hadn’t been paying the taxes, they could have lost them to the tax auction, or one of their ancestors had sold the rights along with the farmland. I don’t want to make that call to let them know if it turns out they no longer owned the rights.

Friday and Saturday were spent watching the weather channel and the windows as the snow kept on falling. I felt like I went to sleep in Maryland and woke up in Michigan or upstate New York!

Today was dig out day. Jason grabbed some of his friends to volunteer and our neighbor Bob was gracious enough to bring over his snow blower and clean it up. I attempted to help, immediately fell on my butt on the ice, right in front of Suki K no less, and decided on a less active roll. I ran for the hot chocolate and donuts, with Suki riding along as my translator. Is it just me, or is Spanish the local language in the fast food industry in Ellicott City. My hearing is bad enough, but when they start speaking with the accent, it is hopeless. Suki finally told them I wasn’t interested. I still don’t know what they were trying to get sell me.

Our close neighbors aren’t so lucky. They still are snowed in as the plows haven’t gotten to them yet. I can finally give something back. If you need a ride to the store or something picked up, call me and I’ll be there. I’m a firm believer in Pay it Forward.

Anyway, the little Indian guy working by himself was more than helpful, bouncing between 4 sets of customers. It is amazing that neither of our suits needed any alteration whatsoever. While neither of us will be mistaken for Ashton Kutcher, we looked good! I don’t understand when they changed how they measured the suit sizes. It’s been a while, but my suits have all been in the 46 - 48L, depending on the cut. The same size suit now is a 52R! I guess it’s another trick to make you thinking your getting more for the money.

Jess’ Graduation Party on Sunday went very well. The turnout was better than we thought because of the weather. Linda and Jess were competing in the punch consumption contest. I think Jess won, because Linda went to bed not long after the last guest left, and Jess went with Jason’s gang and was enjoying a Hot Tub for a few hours more.

I’ve noticed that I’ve been more observant in my retirement. During the funeral service at the church on Saturday I observed a brown string on the right buttock of the lady in the row in front of me. I wasn’t staring, mind you, but whenever we stood up to pray or sing, it was right there! It really stood out as it was a lite color on dark grey pants. I wasn’t sure what the proper etiquette would be. We had been introduced briefly, but I couldn’t remember her name. Should I just reach down and remove it? I might be able to pick it off nonchalantly, but it would required a major lean forward. What if it required a more substantial grab? A slap before I could explain would be the probable outcome, let alone how to explain it to Linda. A tap on the shoulder? Not in the middle of the service. I played it safe, and didn’t do anything, but I’m feeling guilty. What if she wears the pants again, without sending them to the cleaners. She may become the butt of a joke and it will be my fault.

I also am not a fan of the Radford family cemetary in Glen Burnie. The last time Linda, Jess and I went to visit her parents, we were all over the place and couldn’t find the gravesite! The hearse driver had that same problem Saturday, he drove around the cemetary for a while with all the cars in tow before he finally decided to stop and ask directions. Apparently the cemetary people didn’t know either, because we ended up in a new building where they had the final service.

I’m just kidding about the last part, it was an outstanding service and the shelter was much more comfortable that going to the actual grave site. We still don’t know where the gravesite actually is though. I guess when the weather breaks.

Jessica, I’m happy for you.

We also lost a beautiful young man this last week. Linda’s brother Marshall and his wife Pat lost their son Eric this week. Eric was 27 years old and had suffered from Juvenile Diabetes since he was 6 years old. He had lost his sight several years ago, and had suffered many complications over the years. They believe it was a heart attack that finally took him. It will without a doubt leave a hole in the hearts of anyone who knew him. His best friend, who knew him better than almost anyone, described him as a fun loving friend that did everything he could to not let his illness hold him back. The Eric I remember best was a young child that was full of life.

All that pain is now gone, Eric will once again be running, he will once again see beautiful things, and finally be at peace.

Eric, I’m sad for your parents, family, and friends, but I’m happy for you.

I think I have found my true calling. I’ve shared with you some stories about our family history that I’ve been working on the last few weeks. A quick update would let you know that I’ve confirmed the relationship between Nicholas Spencer (1629) and the Spencer’s of England. I’m just missing 2 generations between Nicholas and our 7Grandfather Thomas, but when I do, it goes back to 1063 when the Saxon’s invaded England, up through George Washington, Winston Spencer Churchill, and Princess Diana.

I’ve been doing this day and night, along with a family business project that I’m working on.

This has allowed me to contact people inside and outside the family, bring cousins, aunt and uncles together that probably would have never done so. I haven’t had so much enjoyment just communicating with them, sharing stories, and learning things I never knew.

It shows me the importance of keeping in touch with friends and family. Imagine if you would, not being able to let someone close know of an illness or death in the family. Imagine calling after many years and finding out a brother or sister, mother or father had died. Imagine finding out a long lost friend from far away lived 15 minutes from you for the last 10 years?

So my friends, I’ve decided to become a preacher. A preacher of the importance of keeping in touch with family and friends. Haven’t talked to a brother, cousin, or good friend in too long? Call them, write them, visit them. If they are gone, contact their family. How excited would a son or daughter be to talk about a lost parent or grandparent with a friend that knew them intimately. To share stories, experiences, maybe something they didn’t know. What a gift that is.

Sometimes it’s hard to overcome some heartache or situation that caused the split, but it’s up to you to make that move. It may take a lot of effort, but what a reward to get that relationship back.

Think about it. I hope you enjoyed my sermon.

I’ve been able to spend some time developing a family tree for the Big Moses Spencer family. When we were growing up, it was said that we were granted the land by the King of England, and were related to Winston Spencer Churchill and later Princess Diana.

I became Administrator of the Spencer Farm in 1986, when my Uncle Dennis G Spencer passed away. I wanted to find out more information about our family tree. We had found a bunch of old papers in a firebox that Uncle Dennis had. The original deed, dated 1870 deeding the Big Moses Farm from Moses to Stephen (my great-grandfather), Marion, and Oliver Spencer, his three sons, was in that box. I had found through several sources that Moses father Alfred had actually bought the farm in the 1830’s. I also found in the 1790 Census at the National Archives, the first Moses Spencer, Alfred’s father. I was later able to ascertain that Thomas Bolton Spencer was Moses’ father. We haven’t been able to get any information on Thomas’ father for the last 18 years or so.

Inasmuch as I have some free time, I’ve been at it again. I’ve started a family tree, have been able to get a lot of information between 1800 and today, but nothing on Thomas’.

The thing I knew about him was that he was born in Buckingham County, Va. I decided to start looking there at the county records. I was able to find one Nicholas Spencer who was born to an Aristocratic Family in England in 1929 and came over to America to help the Culpepper family manage their estate. His predecessors included several Earls and went back to the 1400’s and was probably descended from the De Spencer’s from France even earlier than that.

Nicholas Spencer came over with 3 brothers, whose names I haven’t found. In any case, if he isn’t a direct ancestor, the chance that there were 2 unrelated Spencer Families in the late 1600’s and early 1700’s is remote. I have the names of his sons, but there are two generations missing because of the Buckingham Courthouse burning sometime in the early 1700’s and I haven’t been able to get past that. I’m still looking for the missing links.

Nicholas was a very important person back then, at first an administrator and tax collector, eventually becoming the Acting Governor of Virginia. He was related the Washington’s and jointly owned what was Mt Vernon with John Washington, George’s grandfather. They split the property, with John getting the Mt Vernon part, and Nicholas getting the lower Northern Neck portion. He also owned land on Maryland’s Eastern Shore. He was in charge during some very volatile times, and was a strict capitalist. He was a pretty harsh man, with the seizing of beaver skins, and collection of taxes.

Here is his description from the Wikipedia website:

Spencer was apparently a pragmatic administrator. He was also a hard-nosed capitalist. When it came to slavery, for instance, Spencer weighed the benefits of enslaved labor in a strictly cost-benefit way. “The low price of Tobacco,” Spencer wrote, “requires it should bee made as cheap as possible, and that Blacks can make it cheaper than Whites.”[14] Spencer’s rationale for slavery was probably as succinctly heartless as any committed to paper.

So you see, both my pride and my embarrassment.